WASHINGTON, D.C. — A team of NASA astronomers discovered a new asteroid in our solar system today that contains a previously unaccounted for supply of approximately 1.98 million bitcoins. The asteroid has been nicknamed “Satoshi.”

“I was shocked,” says Juyong Kim, lead astronomer. “We were expecting to find metals — gold, silver, maybe platinum — but it never crossed my mind that we might find bitcoins in there, too. How does that even work?”

Michael Saylor argues that the asteroid should be destroyed and the bitcoins burned. “Satoshi was right when he picked a supply of 21 million. It’s the legal drinking age, it’s what you try to get in blackjack, it’s divisible by seven. 23 million would be a disaster.”

Other voices in the community are less certain. “Satoshi’s whitepaper didn’t leave any instructions about what to do if we found a bunch of bitcoins in an asteroid,” says Eric Vorhees, bitcoin investor. “I think everyone should be free to make whatever choices they want regarding the asteroid without government interference. And now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a call with SpaceX on a completely unrelated matter.”

This discovery makes Satoshi (the asteroid) the largest holder of Bitcoin, followed by regular Satoshi, and the Winklevoss twins a distant third. When asked for comment, Cameron and Tyler Winklevoss declined to say anything about the asteroid, but said they were working on a new song that would explain exactly how they feel about it.

Despite the dilution of supply, Bitcoin is up 11%.

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